FOR THE NEXT FIVE YEARS

I am so damn angry and hurt right now. My husband got sentenced to five years in court today and I was not even there for him because I was supposed to be in school. That is where I would have been had my paycheck not been screwed up. Somebody told a white lie and cause me to not get my check, so not only do I have deal with the reality of losing my husband, I am flat BROKE too! I am not meant to be happy because every time I even experience a little bit of happiness, it is snatched away from me. When I am doing good in one place, something else comes up and makes me miserable and seems that every body else in the world is so fucking happy. Why in the hell is that? I am starting to believe that I am cursed and marked for bad things to happen to me. I am always the one to suffer the worst and I am sick of it I want happiness on this earth because I deserve it. I do not break the law, I am kind to everyone and I try to help everybody the best that I can. I love my husband with all my heart and I do not even know what I am going to do without him for the next five years. I need him and he needs me, why can't they see that? I love God, but I think He hates me. I guess I have to go and prepare myself to be lonely for five years. I just can't believe this! Will I ever catch a break?